The Rollercoaster Of Recovery From Narcissistic Abuse
A viciously intense rollercoaster of emotions and experiences is how most victims would describe their time spent with a narcissist. You’d hope, then, that once you break free of their grip, this unpleasant ride would come to an end…but you’d be wrong.
The ups and downs tend to continue long after you’ve left them behind, as if their poison still courses through your veins. Recovery from narcissist abuse is just like any other form of mental or physical recovery – it takes time, work, and determination for the wounds to heal.
There are so many elements of this process that it makes sense to address each one separately.
Feelings For Ex Partners
Despite everything they put you through, you can’t simply flick a switch and turn off the feelings you have for a romantic partner. This is doubly true for a narcissistic ex because of the levels of manipulation they use to induce powerful emotional states in their victims.
Leaving them was no doubt a struggle in itself, but staying away from them is just as difficult. Like with any relationship, you will experience a sense of loss and even one of grief.
You will probably find yourself fighting the desire to rekindle the flame that first drew you to them; you will wish to return and “make things work” even though you know they can’t. Your heart will pull you back in while your rational side will remind you of all the bad times that made you leave in the first place.
This process of longing for your ex while simultaneously reliving the torturous time you spent with them can be extremely painful. You will feel conflicted and confused just as you did during the relationship itself.
This is made all the worse when the narcissist comes back into your life to try and win you back. They will pour on the charm once more and you will have to fight against your urges and stand your ground; it’s not always as easy as it sounds.