How We Got Here His Point of View, From my Perspective
I believe it is only fair to explore my own perverse characteristics that most likely contributed to this mess I find myself in. Are there qualities that attract a predator? I think there probably are and that’s one avenue I wish to explore as I begin the “writing a book” process. I haven’t found any people to interview yet, but I’m not going to worry about that right now. I guess I’m seeking to clarify things in my own mind and writing about it, even if I’m writing to myself, is what I will call therapy for myself.
I’ve been “frozen” for quite some time. I knew that this story wasn’t going to have a happy ending, yet I felt powerless to do anything about it. I was a deer, frozen in the headlights.
I was vacillating between feeling that I needed to stay with him and knowing that I had to get out, at any cost. I couldn’t make myself ACT! I can’t pinpoint the exact moment when that changed, but I finally had made the decision to get out and I found myself able to “do”.
I have read many stories of people in my same situation and they are the same: the chronic lying, belittling, flying into a rage at any real or imagined slight, no empathy, extreme selfishness and much more. And the feelings of helplessness, powerlessness, resulting from being subjected to these abusive behaviors.
What I haven’t found is a common thread in the people who became “victims”, and it may be that there isn’t one.